Forrest Gump and Lyme

Someone asked me the other day how I was feeling. I responded that Lyme's is like Forrest Gump's mama's "box of chocolates."

You really have no idea what you are going to get when you wake up in the morning. That particular day I had tossed aside my 3 days of a migraine with vertigo and instead took a huge bite out of stabbing nerve pain with extreme exhaustion. I actually worked that day, and what I mean by "worked" is I woke up at 8am but answered emails and text messages in bed from my phone until 10am. Stumbled downstairs and wrote up an offer on my tablet in between making coffee and putting together a high-fat, amino acid loaded smoothie. It was noon by then and I had to show property at 4pm.

Four. Dern. Hours. Ugh....what to do. Most people would think that is beyond ample time. To someone with a chronic condition, that means half the day has already ticked down and you are still unshowered and in your pajamas. Dragged myself upstairs, knowing I had 2 choices for inflammation reduction and increased energy: 45 minutes in my sauna followed by a lukewarm shower and a short nap, or a 30 minute epsom salt soak followed by a longer nap. I elected the soak-nap combo as both options involved bathing but I needed the longer nap. Magnesium wipes you out in such doses.

Woke up relatively refreshed at 2pm. Ok. Must grab lunch, get ready, answer calls and emails, and leave half an hour to get to my appointment on time. In the meantime, during my nap, my clients had added on another property they wanted to see. Executive decision was made to throw my hair up in a ponytail to cut out a few minutes and choose an outfit I may have worn the day before but don't really remember because it was a Migraine Day, but felt it would be OK since I didn't see these clients yesterday.

Arrived on time, plastered a smile on my face because who wants a whiney Realtor? I sat or stood around a bit more than normal. Didn't have the energy to climb stairs at each house we viewed. Still painful. Still tired. But I did the job my clients hired me to do. Canceled plans for a girl's night dinner with a fellow ginger. Because who wants to hang out with a whiney ginger? Finally got home after what felt like a Gilgameshian trek (in reality was only 2 hours), warmed up leftovers (who knows how long they had been in the fridge) went to bed at 9pm.

Woke up today with the hand tremor-numb feet bon bon but it somehow tastes sweeter than the migraine-infused vertigo wrapped in inflammed nerve exhaustion. Infinitely preferred to the brain-fog slow-to-no recall nougat that just gets stuck in your teeth. And that's all I gotta say about that!

Spiders and Disney

I haven't posted in a while, either from feeling decent and being busy with work and family while I had the energy...or feeling miserable and not wanting to take on one more thing. Even the simplest of tasks can become an Everest when your brain is misfiring and your hands hurt.

I was able to go to Disney with my nephews and mostly enjoy myself! It was HOT in Orlando and I was beyond relieved that it didn't cause another Herx reaction. Temperature extremes on either end bring them on. And though I didn't ride all the bigger rides (vertigo) and had to take moments away from my family and the mass of humanity at the parks (nervous system overload), I really held up fairly well! The only bad day I had was on our return drive back home, and oh my it was AWFUL. I had a massage the day before and it caused me to Herx, ugh...

Who doesn't feel like a kid at Disney?

I detest washing my hair. Not that I dislike clean hair or want to bring back Grunge, as I actually enjoy having my hair did. It is the process of washing my hair that puts me in a tailspin every single time. Let me explain via a good ol' 80's tune by Rockwell: "I always feel like spiders are touching meeee!" My nervous system is shot so I feel creepy crawlies that don't exist as well as phantom itches beneath my skin that I can't locate to scratch for relief. The shower exacerbates the creepy crawlies. It is hard to regulate too hot versus too cold, I feel each drop of water individually, and not having the water hit everywhere simultaneously confuses my central nervous system. So I take A LOT of tub baths. What happens when you shampoo your hair? You lose on average about 100 hairs. I have hair down to my mid-back. As those 100 hairs fall they feel like spiders traipsing down the backs of my legs on their way to the drain. "When I'm in the shower, I'm afraid to wash my hair. I might open my eyes and find an Orb Weaver there!"

I will end this post on a positive note. At Keller Williams Realty, we have a capping commission structure. What this means is that after we agents have paid out a certain amount of money in company dollar, we get to keep 100% of our commission until our year resets.  I usually cap in about 4 months, which means I get to enjoy 8 glorious months of banking every penny I earn. I have had such a hard time with my health the last 2 years, I really didn't think I would cap this last year. My anniversary date is June 1, and it took me until the middle of May but I DID IT! I capped before my reset date and was able to enjoy 100% of 2 closing commissions and 1 referral check. I thank the Good Lord for bringing me the right opportunities at the right times, strength to get through my darker days, and the 2 assistants who helped me manage my files as I certainly didn't have the energy or health to do it all on my own.

If you or anyone you know thinks they may have Lyme's but are unsure of where to turn for answers, I would love to hear from you! Not that I have all the answers because I don't, but I sure have learned a few pitfalls to avoid on the road to reclaiming my health. Would love to help!

Spoonful of Lyme

The first time I heard about The Spoon Theory was from my friend Sheri who has a very debilitating condition called Nutcracker Syndrome. I immediately got it. It made perfect sense. I have been borrowing energy from other days for so long I am happy to at least now have a tangible analogy that healthy people can grasp.

I used to be one of those fairly healthy folks who could run with the big dogs for days and rarely have to sit on the porch. Today, I feel like the porch. Some days I have just enough energy to make it downstairs to fix breakfast by 10am. At times, I have finally finished my breakfast right about time to start making lunch. Because everything takes longer. I am wired like the hare, a typical Type-A CEO mindset who has had to learn to rethink the way I do everything. I have become the tortoise. The rapid get-it-all-done-yesterday mentality now resides in a body that just needs rest, and lots of it.

So what is The Spoon Theory anyway? Essentially, those with a chronic illness have to budget their time more efficiently and make more difficult choices about how to spend that time. Imagine being given 12 spoons at the beginning of the day, and each task will cost at least one of them. Just getting out of bed is 1 spoon, and if I didn't sleep well that is another. Two spoons down and I'm not even out of bed yet. I am quite often down 10 spoons before I have even left the house! The other day I was herxing BAD and ran out of all 12 spoons by lunch time. I knew I was spent for the day, nothing was going to get accomplished, and I needed groceries. So for the first time in my life, I ordered them online and had them delivered. For many, that may be the norm or sound like an indulgence. For me...it was a huge step backward and I cried all afternoon because I felt useless. That, in turn, snatched away a spoon from the next day because I would inevitable wake up tired for expending additional energy I didn't have to begin with.

Since you can save up or borrow from another day, I call Sunday my Spoon-Saver Day. The Father of Creation had it right: take a day to rest and regenerate. I use Sunday to restock my weekly supplement divider, plan meals for the week, and just rest. I take a long, indulgent nap every Sunday after church and lunch. Every. Single. Sunday. I plan my spoons for the week, knowing that I will be spending a whole day's worth if I have clients who want to go see property. The Good Lord has so far worked things in my favor so that I wake up with enough energy on the days I have clients. Or, I will shuffle around my day and take the Scarlett O'Hara approach to things like housework. Either way, I have learned to cherish my spoons and allocate them thoughfully and with purpose.

P. S. This blog post cost me 2 spoons!! One from a few days ago when I started it and one of today's spoons to finish it.

Killing Bartonella

Sounds like a bad Lifetime movie about the systematic stalking and ultimate demise of a college co-ed. In some ways that is exactly what I am doing: methodically pursuing a stealthy critter with a fancy family name in order to eradicate it from my cells. Minus Tori Spelling in the starring role, naturally. I could probably draw a parallel to the level of irritation both present to the general public but I digress...

Bartonella is a bacteria that frequently presents its perfectly laquered nails as a co-infection of Lyme's. Picture it as the catty sorority sister who stirs the pot at breakfast then retreats to her perch to observe the conflict. Always there lurking around corners and snickering from the top of the stairs during a mixer. Right about the time things have settled down in the house *BAM*....Bartonella strolls in and drops an additional juicy tidbit.

Bartonella has a sordid family history with many branches to its lineage. It can be transmitted by not only ticks, but also fleas, mosquitoes, spiders, many a creepy crawling insect of which we have in droves in the state of NC. It also can be transmitted by our loving furbabies, believe it or not! One root of its family tree causes Cat Scratch Fever, and no...Ted Nugent is NOT the co-ed stalker in this film.

Behold my poisons of choice!

                                               

I currently dose both Bartonella and her pesky sister Burgdorfi (Lyme's spirochete) 3 times a day with teasel root. It is an incredibly powerful herbal remedy that will flat knock you on your yoga booty if you accidentally take even one drop over your recommended dose. It's crazy! When I picked up a bottle in a local store the seal at the top was busted, and about 10 drops spilled onto my hand. I immediately herxed and was miserable for a few days.

Next comes one of my favorites which is known for its anti-viral, anti-microbial, and oxidative properites....colloidal siver. This is the shiny lavalier around the neck of both co-eds and is in my opinion a holistic remedy everyone needs daily. I even bought a 5% eye and ear solution that is helping clear my chronic eye inflammation and the tone of my tinnitus is changing in just one week. Not sure if the tinnitus clearing is from the solution or my updated oral supplement protocol, but my ears are definitely itching less internally. As far as the oral colloidal silver solution, I really like this one from Nature's Sunshine.

The Catucky Derby...Bogey, Simba, St. James (L to R)

Lastly, I have added in Una de gato, also known as cat's claw. Can you think of a more aptly named method to stalk and destroy such a catty co-ed? This is also a very powerful healing herb, and the recommended supplemental dose is only 1 a day. I am testing for 4 a day yet I have to build up to that dose over a 30-day period. How about that...cat's claw to shred the bacteria that causes cat scratch fever. God does have a sense of humor in the midst of all this lurking and gossiping in my central nervous system. Fortunately, I don't have the cat scratch fever Bartonella strain. The uña de gato I take is also a Nature's Sunshine product as is about 90% of all of my supplements.

Now that you know the back story and are familiar with the plot twists...can you blame me for Killing Bartonella?

My talons are out, and as the adage goes...mess with the kitty, get the claws!

One-Year Lyme's Anniversary

Most anniversaries are happy occasions, they mark the passage of what are hopefully joyful times. Today is the one-year anniversary of my Lyme's self-diagnosis. Wish I could say I am filled with joy about it, yet in some way I am because a year ago today my life changed. I found answers that had eluded me for decades.

I have talked about it on here before, of how the good Lord literally led me to take a Lyme's assessment I saw on Facebook. At first I poo-pooed it like many of you probably have or will. Then suddenly the brain fog I had been living with for years was lifted and replaced by hope! I wasn't losing my ever-loving mind, and I wasn't aging quicker than I should be. I discovered I do have a debilitating condition...yet it is also a treatable one! If you are interested in taking it or even curious about the symptoms, it is worth the time invested. Click the link and scroll down to download the assessment. A detailed list of symptoms is also below:

By now some of you are yanking on the anchor, wanting to stop this ship in mid-sail. What do I mean..."self-diagnosis?" After I took this positively conclusive assessment I immediately started looking for a local Lyme-literate doctor. Everything I was reading prepared me that a typical, allopathic doctor will not treat for the dis-ease. I go to a naturopath anyway, so it was my instinct to head that direction. I found a clinic in Chapel Hill that looked promising! This is how my conversation went with the overly enthusiastic office manager:

Him: She is THE BEST Lyme's doctor in the country, patients just flock here!

Me: Great! So how does she diagnose? Does she do blood tests or what?

Him: No, blood tests are inconclusive at the chronic stage so she will diagnose based on symptoms. But she still draws blood anyway. You'll LOVE her!

Me: I had read that about the blood tests, and I have already done an extensive questionnaire. So, what does it cost and how long can I expect to be there for my first appointment?

Him: She charges $375/hour and you will be here around 3 hours. That price does not include your bloodwork. We have an opening 6 weeks from now, aren't you excited?

Me: Hmm. So, let me get this straight. I am to suffer for 6 more weeks without relief or answers. Then, I will be paying over a thousand bucks to get blood drawn for unnecessary labwork as well as fill out a detailed assessment I have already done myself for free? 

(CRICKETS)

Him: But she's so good!

I hung up with Mr. Jolly and immediately called my naturopath, sent her my assessment results, booked an appointment to see her the following week. She made calls to doctors in her network and sent me a few things to do to get me by before my appointment. I ordered my infrared sauna and ionic detox footbath from Amazon, had them the next day.

Today at the one-year mark I took the assessment again, and there have been many improvements! My hair is no longer falling out, my daily migraine is now weekly, brain fog has diminished, memory is improving, fewer muscle twitches, night sweats are reduced, not as dizzy upon standing. Energy level is greatly improved. Many other changes and improvements yet I still have quite a ways to go for a complete reversal of symptoms. At least I am starting to have more good days than bad!

Lyme's is a whole-body condition that can affect every system and every organ of your body, that is precisely why it is notoriously mis-diagnosed and under-diagnosed. I helped one of my college friends self-diagnose this week after many years of her doctors not listening to her. It is a tricky condition, certainly frustrating at best and debilitating at worst. But it is one that IS treatable and I am determined to be a success story on the other end of my diagnosis. And with that, I am off to kill some spirochetes in my sauna ;-)

What in the world is quantum biofeedback?

Dr. Kim and I have changed up my treatment protocol a bit...and it seems to be working! My body has fought and is winning the battle of eradicating viruses and bacterial infestations I have had for years. We are now able to specifically target the Lyme's spirochete and I feel like a superhero giving the smack-down to my personal Kryptonite some days. I have gone from weekly biofeedback sessions to now only needing one a month. You may think that a weekly anything isn't that big of a deal, and it isn't until you add in the 2 hour drive to Wilmington from Raleigh, another 2 hours sitting in a chair, then an additional 2 hour return to Raleigh. Yeah. Weekly visits even with someone as wonderful as Dr. Kim was getting OLD as Methuselah.

Since most of you are probably not familiar with the main treatment protocol I have chosen, I thought I would give you just a little bit of information about it. Essentially, Quantum Biofeedback is a machine based on quantum physics and it works with your body's biorhythms at the cellular and energetic level. It is pretty much hitting a full system reset button every time you do one of these sessions.

I am connected to a computer by 5 bands from 90 minutes to 2 hours each session. I admit, when I first started seeing Kim for this therapy for migraines several years ago I was a bit skeptical. Actually, so skeptical and enough of a brat that I had to try it out just to debunk the therapy. I initially purposely withheld things that were going on with my body and my bodily systems just to see if they were picked up on the software. To my amazement, many minute things showed up on the test Matrix...even a Cheezits binge several days prior to one session. (I know, right?) I quickly quit doubting the technology and now I gladly submit to this slightly esoteric therapy.

I have been asked if I feel anything during one of my sessions. I am one of those humans who is very attuned to what is going on within my system. I can usually tell what area Kim is working on, whether it be my gums, my central nervous system, my back, even my liver or gallbladder.  It doesn't hurt at all, but sometimes I can feel an organ twitch or jump or feel additional energy in certain areas. The biggest payoff is at the end of that hour and a half to two hour session when I am balanced, focused, and feel a sense of well-being about myself. It is worth the 6-7 hours out of a day, even for someone like me who is unable to sit still very well for 5 minutes.

What I like best about this technology is it resets the mind - body - spirit connection. Have you ever felt like things were just off and that you were not firing on all of your cylinders? Can you suspend your skepticism and disbelief enough to understand that a lot of dis-ease is caused by emotional blocks? Earl Nightingale said it best: "you become what you think about." Do you feel better about yourself when you are sitting around complaining, or when you are thanking God for being able to hear the birds sing that day? By the same token, when you are feeling awful does it help when you sit around and miserate about it or get out and try to do something to help someone else? And that my friends is precisely why I am writing this blog.

Yes, Lyme's dis-ease and its subsequent symptoms were caused by a microscopic critter that invaded my system decades ago. Years of self-abuse by eating the wrong things, not getting enough sleep, allowing emotional blocks to cause me to physically stumble...not following my heart let alone the God I believed in yet turned my back on. All of these factors contributed to my body not being able to clear the minute stealth bomber wreaking havoc in my body. Those days are over, friends, thanks to a vast array of nutritional supplements, lifestyle changes, an assortment of treatment modalities...and LOTS of prayer.

Word for the day: Spirochetes

Borrelia burgdorferi. Up until 10 months ago I would have thought that was the name of a drink concoction at a pretentious hotel bar in some exotic location. Or perhaps Justin Bieber's new Swedish supermodel girlfriend. Today I know it intimately as it is the bane of my existence, my nemesis, yet not my downfall as I am going to win this battle. Borrelia burgdorferi is simply a big, fancy name for a microscopic critter commonly known as the Lyme's spirochete.

This nasty vermin is double-coated and corkscrew-shaped, the better to hide itself from that which would knock it on it's fancy-named booty. It has enjoyed perhaps 2 decades of destroying my central nervous system, joints, vital organs, and my very sanity at times. I thank the Good Lord for leading me to a Facebook page that contained a questionnaire I felt prompted to take. Unlike the Chemistry 101 final my Freshman year at college, this was unfortunately a test I passed with flying colors. Suddenly I had the answer as to why I couldn't get well no matter how many green smoothies I drank, supplements I took, or foods I removed from my diet. Sweet! Should be smooth sailing, right?

WRONG!

That little questionnaire sent me on a trip around my internal world that still has uncharted territory. It's like all this time I thought the earth was a sphere just to wake up one day and discover it is really round like a tabletop. It has taken my naturopathic doctor and me 10 months to kill off secondary infectons (like Epstein–Barr) and rebuild my immune system enough to be able to take the battle to the beast. I am armored up to the hilt now, though!

Enter in the nemesis of B. burgdorferi....teasel root. If you pay enough attention you quickly learn that God puts the remedy right alongside of the toxin. Teasel is a weed that grows where? You guessed it. In forests commonly known to have a very high population of deer and therefore deer ticks. This homeopathic remedy is very potent and powerful. It has taken me a month to move up to where I can tolerate 2 drops of it 3 times a day, and that still isn't the optimum dose. I am herxing bad right now (see previous post on here for description), I am about to jump out of my skin. And I will gladly continue to suffer through many healing crises as long as it takes to kill off these little vampires that have clung to me like so many leeches for entirely too long. I am becoming the windshield instead of the bug, braving the elements of my internal flora and fauna as I eradicate this infestation. I am making light of it to interject some humor, but have no doubt that my healing has been a long journey with many more Gilgameshian adventures around the bend. Healing from Lyme's ain't no joke. But I am healing! Every day I have a bit more energy, my tinnitus is improving, I feel less toxic. Still have a long way to go, I am very encouraged however.

So do yourself a favor the next time you go hiking. Or walking in a meadow. Or playing on the playground with your kids. Or even out showing property like me. Inspect yourself and each other for creepy-crawlies that can be as tiny as a period on this page. Ticks aren't just a nuisance from the arachnid family: they are little armored tanks with both immediate and time-released ammo.